a place to study

when i started law school, i was serving as a seminary teacher. everyone -- except dev, who always supports me -- assumed i would ask to be released because the demands of school plus being a mom to five young kids was plenty to keep me busy. in fact, once members of the ward and our family realized i planned to keep teaching, several of them sought me out to talk me out of my craziness.

seminary is a demanding calling and requires a lot of preparation and time, but i absolutely love it. it's my favorite calling ever, actually. the thought of not teaching seminary never even entered my mind. i was about to start the craziest mental adventure of my life. i didn't need less blessings, i needed more. service is one of the greatest methods of receiving peace and love from the Lord that i have in my life. i didn't want to let go of that.

even though i knew i would receive blessings for my willingness to continue to serve and sacrifice, i ended up receiving more blessings that i could have even imagined. truly the Lord opened the windows of heaven and poured out a blessing on our heads. the fun part about being willing to sacrifice and serve is that some of the blessings are so surprising it's practically like a birthday party.

case in point: before starting school, i imagined i would study at home. turned out that studying at home was too loud and distracting (i know, shocker with five kids in the house, right?) and i needed a quiet, safe place to go late in the evening and early in the morning. because i was serving as a seminary teacher, i had a key to the building and to the seminary room. i asked the bishop if it would be ok for me to use the space to study and he said yes. i have spent so many hours in that tiny room that automatically locks with my space heater, my books, and my snacks. it was perfect spot for me because i could bring food, talk out loud, be completely safe, and be completely alone -- none of which i could have done in our local library or any other place in our town.

and all because i said yes to a calling. i said yes to service and sacrifice. i said yes. so God could bless me in ways i needed that i didn't even know.

oh God is so very aware of us. so very, very aware. being aware of Him and of others gives me the ability to feel Him being aware of me.

very cool.